These are all songs or are one day intended to be songs. Some of them are finished, some will never be complete. This link is for you if you want to read fragments and poetry.

Delectably Caustic... Listen

so lets say from the core of your boredom comes something remotely marketable something remarkably remote, with just enough unique demeanor to raise an eyebrow do you a: panic, b: capitalize or c: hide from the planet, curl up and lay low see, it's not about a halo and it's not about jail time. It's life on probation

It's easy to get knifed in the back climbing the ladder of success you may find yourself kicking the guy below you in the chest you may get kicked in the face, stomped to the ground, ground up and spit out, out-weighed, out-witted, out-smarted and out of luck.

after 22 years I see it doesn't come easy or unprompted.. Hell, it comes kicking and screaming the whole way. You get what you pay for and at times you pay for what you did. You should always turn into a skid signal when lane changing. Sound off like you got a pair and for god's sake, cut that hair

drop me a line some time and we can shoot the shit. drop the gun or I swear to God, you'll be tasting it drop dead mother fucker I'll see you in hell, I mean I'll send you hate mail while your in hell and I'm in heaven.. I guess If I get in, or maybe I need to join a club or wear a turban.. should I confess my sins to an indulgent pedophile preacher?

corruption flows through the purist of rivers. clearly purity isn't what it was cracked up to be.. How can we look back on history, at slavery, at persecution, at failure, again and again.. and be convinced that we're not totally wrong? to err is human, to forgive is divine.

anyways It's not about what you can do, but who you know. work harder not smarter because the smart are the ones working on being smarter, thanks to my coffee and alcohol fixes I was able to nix the cigs and save my lungs while I kill my liver well.. it's all about trade offs.. from trading cards to trading stocks

I traded my guitar for furniture and today I sit and write songs about losing my guitar I guess you never really get too far if you forget who and where you are it's hard to avoid the same mistakes again when you've forgotten where you've been here since I can remember.. now if I could only remember when..

So what if some people are born destined for fame? what does that mean for the rest of us? what is my destiny if he's already got the one I wanted? and when is it my turn to find $50 on the ground when no one's around? when do I win a contest I know I never entered? escape a plane crash uninjured?

spill hot coffee on my crotch and live the rest of my life on a yacht? rob a bank and never get caught? when do I steal the show? when will the bills be paid by my accountant, and my garage hold more cars than I can count and when will money become no object? when will gucci and armani fill my closet?

Now we all say when I get rich I'm going to be different I'm gonna keep it real. you see there's nothing real to keep. waiting for opportunity to knock is like counting sheep to fall asleep.. for me it's never worked and frankly, I'm convinced that it never will.. the difference between willpower and willing instant success

is willpower exists and your winning lottery ticket.. hot coffee lawsuit.. unguarded bank vault... perfect religion.. perfect drug... un polluted lungs.. odorless dung.. free rides.. and wealth without willingness to work and dedicate and sacrifice and miss out and do without and starve and sleep in your car and swallow your pride and handle your business simply does not.

Not in this lifetime.. not on this globe..
forget what you think and increase what you know.

This song is not about you...

met you browsing the frozen food section
sparked a conversation you showed no interest in
I hung my head and proceeded to checkout
all too typical of my never ending drought

the weather's warmer this year
my heart grows stronger I feel
the sky's so bright and so clear
my heart grows colder I fear

noticed you driving on the road the other day
soon as this cigarette's gone I'll think of something to say
lo and behold you made a left hand turn
put out my cigarette but still felt something burn

there's something sweet in the air
the drought is over I swear
the sky's so bright and so clear
my heart grows colder I fear

you were getting some bad service at the bar
got her attention for you; said how beautiful you are
you liked what you saw in me but there was just one thing
told me you're married and then I felt the sting

the weather's warmer this year
my heart grows stronger I feel
the sky's so bright and so clear
my heart grows colder I fear

this song's about you and I haven't met you yet
solitude drowns me and I've got no regrets
the summer is come and it's promising me that
it won't send me lonely to winter's welcome mat

the weather's warmer this year
my heart grows stronger I feel
the sky's so bright and so clear
my heart grows colder I fear

there's something sweet in the air
the drought is over I swear
the sky's so bright and so clear
my heart grows colder I fear

Irregular Hip-Hop Infarction... Listen

I often find myself beside myself I guess it's norma-l-ot of times I don't understand what motivates people to ignore the obvious signs and other times I don't see any signs so I make my own roads and wind up where I started don't get me wrong I mean I don't think it's right at least not tonight at any rate

I limit the output, boost the input, turn it up and turn around I'm on top of the world yet somehow so deep under fucking ground are we in the mainstream or stuck in the swamp? do I sink or swim? should I get naked and flaunt?

if there's nothing left to do that hasn't been done already
then who are we? and where do we go?
and why am I asking you? what the fuck do you know?
who's she? who am I? who are you? and when do we die? why are we here?

there are so many questions, so very few answers
there are so many singers, so very few dancers
there are so many lies so very few truths
there are so many censors and still a corrupted youth

there are so many preachers and so many liars!

there are a great deal of patriots for the time being
there are shit loads of punks spitting the obscene
lyrics you love to mouth when you listen to your stereo

and your like "fuck the radio that shit is overblown, let's go to the mall and to an indie rock show" what does it mean, if anything? Does it end here, or is this a new beginning? does history repeat? and if so where is the loop point?

is man basically good or evil? when we die will we fry? do we need baptisms or darwinisms? euphemisms or crystal prisms? voodoo chants? mystic reptiles? medallions around our neck? what will keep us from hell? what will enlighten us without boring us?

what will frighten us when we're desensitized to violence
and what will entertain us when nothing is funny anymore?
who is left when everyone is out the door?
who takes the stage when the power goes out?
who gets the rain and who gets the drought?
his clothes are rags and she's at the cleaners
and he'd have been happier if he never had seen her.

some of us plan and some of us build
some of us eat fast food, some seldom get a meal.
some of us lie, cheat and steal
some of us are great some overcome with hate

some like it raw, some take it off
some times you gotta turn your head and cough
some days are better left in darkness
while the landlord slides eviction papers under the door

Now we explore the possibility of there being a planet full of life, full of diversity, full of one thing after another full of shit, full of pride, and full of the bodies of people who've died full of angst, full of depression

fools rush in to shit too fast.. I mean slow down and let me pass you asshole! full of roadrage, full of contempt fueled by the need to strive for certain success lay in bed for hours and get no rest send flowers to the one that you love best and never bet the devil your head

nah, forget it, forget everything I've said

That vaguely familiar old feeling...

You and I communicate with no need for words
Your voice is the sweetest sound I've ever heard
There's no drug half as good as your touch
Your beauty is nothing short of too much

Too much to ignore.. way too hard to describe;
my feelings for you are too much to hide
I see you in such a glorious light
One day fall in love with you I just might

why aren't you just another pretty face?
How can I be so damn caught up in you?
baby it's hard for me to explain it

Your sex appeal is so much more than skin deep
you speak and my full attention you keep
you keep me intrigued and make me believe
it's cool again to wear your heart on your sleeve

Jackie, oh you've got such power over me
and I don't think that I will be
content until you and I make love
baby you just fit me like a glove

why aren't you just another pretty face?
How can I be so damn caught up in you?
baby it's hard for me to explain it

Gamble...

here I am
at this familiar crossroads

filled with false hope, unwarranted doubt, misdirected love, insatiable desire spilled into sporadic patterns on wadded up paper and then balled tightly into sweaty palms

time is short though it takes too long
when seconds pass like kidney stones

the longer you wait sit and debate
taking a chance 'fore it's too late

I hide that devilish grin again
behind this face of calloused skin

as a gamblin' man I'll take the risk
cuz I know what it means to feel like this

it's a gamble
even if you know the game
it's a gamble
be careful not to slow play
it's a gamble
forget about what you've learned
it's a gamble
shit happens and you get burned

Opprobrium for Terror... Listen

it's creepy nowadays things that horrified us from history
they're on the news, they're today's top story and we just get
more and more intolerant.

..intolerant and less affected, more infected
with hatred and killing, slaying, mass murder and death.

holy wars, car bombs, bad karma and the war on drugs
the only thing that makes sense anymore is too much of a fucking bore
there is really no point so let's roll a joint and laugh again
because the only time I can eat anymore is when I'm stoned

stoned to death; we read about that shit thousands of years later
and think to ourselves, how horrible it must have been
how horrible it must have been to come down with the
thousands of flaming family members in the twin towers

how fucking terrible it is today when suicide bombing, sniping
random pedestrians and collateral damage is all around us
It might seem that those who landed on the driest rock
who had the more imaginative theory for evolution can't stand it

Is the hatred spawned from pure jealousy? is the hatred spawned from envy? enveloped in fear and afraid to check the mail, develop a thick skin for your kids will live in hell.. they'll live in fear that today's society has never known. hatred has brewed for decades

it's been simmering for centuries, radicalist terrorist
sons of some crazy bitch, they believe their own lies
it's just more and more people living and dying by their
own religion, idealism based on pure fabrication and intolerance.

Abstruse Seducement...

I've got angels and I've got demons
I've got angels and I've got demons

the angels say to give, but the demons got me stealin
the angels say forgive, while the demons say get even

the angels say that living is only the beginnin
and demons say to get rich and fuck lots and lots of women

the angels say to help your fellow man when he's needin
while the demons say to help yourself to whatever your fiending

angels whisper in my ear when I'm alone in the dark
demons scream in my face weather I'm at home or at the park

I've got angels and I've got demons
I've got angels and I've got demons

life is full of double edged swordsman
creepin in the shadows and peepin around corners
leading bands of ninjas and barkin out orders
planning terror attacks and claiming to be martyrs

I've got angels and I've got demons

the angels say be passive and turn the other cheek
demons say act hard and pack heat when in the street

the angels speak in riddles I can barely understand
the demons are loud and clear my friend

the angels appear as bums and peasants askin for quarters
the demons are half naked lookin sexy on the corners

the angels get lost in the shuffle, forgotten with ease
while the demons are overbearing, and make it difficult to breathe

I've got angels and I've got demons
I've got angels and I've got demons

Life is full of temptations and apparitions
job applications, admirations, paid vacations
lacerations, abominations, 3rd world nations
and useless publications, so man your battlestations

I've got angels and I've got demons
I've got angels and I've got demons

the angels are ambiguous and unclear at times
the demons are catchy as pop and soothing as rhymes

the angels are dingy, musty and unappealing
the demons are aesthetic, athletic and revealing

the angels are there when the world has turned it's back
the demons are on their hunches prepared to attack

the angels are the thorns that warn you not to touch it
the demons are the red pedals that draw you to their clutches

I've got angels and I've got demons
I've got angels and I've got demons

Life is full of bullshit and devoid of reason
incessant and oppressive absolutely detested
intriguing and demeaning with vermin it's teaming
but who's to say it's always going to be that way?

Inadvertent Parallax...

one day I'm frustrated with life fed up with the strife
the day in, day out, make ends and pay out, write checks, pay rent

what's it all for anyways?

what's it mean in the end? What lies around the bend?
who's got the time, patience or an ear to lend?

who cares? what gives? who really dares to live?
who's got the idea that is going to save us all the trouble?

who's going to drop the ball? where does the time go?
why should this rhyme or flow? I don't know

the next day I sit down and pluck my acoustic
and suddenly the glue sticks, I'm fixed

I'm happy about nothing and nothing makes me happier
than stepping outside, enjoying the ride

I take a deep breath, with eyes open wide
something makes sense but not dollars and cents

we're all just dangling from a chain of events
wandering aimlessly and pondering endlessly

binge and purge, sin and splurge, I get the urge
then I'm back on track, no looking back

ready to learn and willing to teach
the sky is the limit so it's there we should reach

you don't know what you have until you lose it
I'm talking about your mind, so use it!

it's a terrible thing to waste, often a hard thing to face
but when it burns out there is no replacement

I'm intrigued by the extreme opposites I find
in case that wasn't painfully apparent in my rhymes

variety, she is absolutely the spice of life
without her, mundane lethargy filets like a knife

bored to the bone, to the core, without something new
it's easier regretting what you did than what you didn't do

embrace change, sensation and the ones you love
your fate is in your hands so take off the rubber gloves.

Reckless Abandon...

it's an irrational state
coincidence becomes fate
caution is forgotten with ease

it's quite a grand illusion
this logical occlusion
submerged you will struggle to see

you tell yourself it's not a trap
but you're treading lightly on that path
you sell yourself the best you can
but you're getting older with every passing sham

in such a violent release
all restraint begins to cease
walking barefoot through sour grapes

temporary insanity
oh, the humanity
you were listening but don't know what to say

you bring yourself to take a chance
but you're treading lightly on that path
you sing yourself to sleep, at last
but you're getting colder with every broken pact

wake up from this prison
with walls of indecision
they're real to you but all of this is fake

a diabolical ruse
feels there's nothing left to lose
but in reality there's nothing left to gain

you tell yourself it's in the past
but you're treading lightly on that path
when looking back you force a laugh
because eventually you'll find that better half

The DUI Blues...

there's nowhere to hide from the world of trouble
I've landed myself in the midst of
nowhere to run, nowhere to go, no refuge
from the fines, no income in these times

these tribulations of mine they twist and they
wind and torment and they bind
that split second of time in which my mind was to
impaired to guide my car between the lines

into the median I did fly and through a fence no lie,
I remember very little and I
could have died, I mean I feel like giving it a try
but the worst case scenario is not that I died

but that I killed another on the road, a family or a pedestrian
I could have made it further
I could have swerved into oncoming traffic,
20 car pile up, vehicular manslaughter

there's no easy way out
you can try and try
there's no easy way out
not even if you die
there's no easy way out
and if you've got half a mind you'll
know what I'm talkin about

all this shit looming in my mind, bad as it is,
it's not as bad as it seems
not as bad as it could be,
reluctantly I agree you see I received a

misdemeanor dui.. I'm lucky they tell me.
I'm lucky my car is totaled and I have no job.
my money spent on fines, license suspended
and I may be looking at some jail time

it's unreal sometimes the realities of life..
yesterday's strife is today forgotten.
totally petty compared to what now has turned rotten
time to forget the success I've sought and deal with my problems

it's nobody's fault but my own
and I'm still looking for someone to blame
indecision takes a toll on my sanity with the force of a hurricane
physical pain and mental anguish does it have to be this way?

there's no easy way out
you can try and try
there's no easy way out
not even if you die
there's no easy way out
and if you've got half a mind you'll
know what I'm talkin about

it's hard to say how the bills will
ever be paid with no money made
how will I survive when I can't even drive
to the store, to the hospital to the morgue

I feel the cold grip of depression
enveloping me when I'm weak, slowing me when I speak
whispering when I sleep, and kicking me when I'm down
it's all around.. I feel I could drown

but I know I won't.. because there's no easy way out
that's not what life's about when in doubt
I look at the past and look past the immediate future
sometimes I see light and sometimes I see darkness

so in closing, I guess this mess is just what I needed
no contest I'll plead, and do my time and pay my fines
my past is full of trials, as are my days to come
so I'll stay on the road and follow the signs

there's no easy way out
you can try and try
there's no easy way out
not even if you die
there's no easy way out
and if you've got half a mind you'll
know what I'm talkin about
you'll see what I mean by there's no easy way out

The Next Step...

return to sender, embark on a real mind bender
the tale of a boy and his situation
the outcome of his decisions, read it without the revisions
for the epilogue is no more interesting than a catalog

rehearsed dialogue, or a simplified error log
the algorithms of a recurring nightmare
decipher the code, encrypt your soul
and swallow you whole, unbearably slow

there's one way out and there's no escape
it could be worse, so why complain?
you just might lose, so why campaign?
forget the normal, embrace the insane

It dawned on me that all hope is gone
it's gone for good, but it hasn't gone far
the swim across the river causes turbulence
but to stay on this shore means certain doom

remember when life was so easy to interpret
when decisions were obvious, choices were clear
I was right then and there how long ago? a year
now my mind is in turmoil and how does my blood boil

so confused as I wander in fields of chaotic despair
how have I got this far, so far beyond repair
so far I haven't cared, the scent of change is in the air
and so I'll embark, for that step is finally here

Back to the pen again... Listen to a very poor performance and recording

It's been a while since I have written,
as of late I've been rather stricken
laden with tumultuous strife
tumultuous strife and the hardships of life

It's been like walking up a mountain side
I feel that over the rise lies my demise
just around the bend could be the end
shall I cross the bridge or jump in?

but then again it could be that surprise I've sought
or that ticket I bought and lost.
money owed to me by my deadbeat ex boss.
get your ass face down in the sauce

ravenous interjections and slanted decisions
filet the day away in the shade of rescission
drop your pad and pen, forget the fact that I forgot
come to the door and look what I brought!

It's seldom that I actually shut up and listen
it's during those specific times I'm blind
what did I have? exactly what did I lose?
what am I left with besides a burnt out fuse?

why is life so hectic as I near my goals?
and so blissful when I take the path of lost souls?
why is your advice so right and my vice so wrong?
why the hell do I have to write these songs?

The Shallow end of Mental Fragments... Listen to the music this is eventually going to be recorded with

can't help but wonder what I've missed during all of this
I exist constantly and only live every so often
can't help but ponder what my motivation is
when I lie dormant like a sack of shit

Wake me up and send me on my way
it's judgment day and I've little to nothing to say
for myself and for the people I've helped
Yet I can go on for hours about the pain I've felt

I can say a thing or two about the pain I've caused
but I speak only of loose interpretations; estimations
I don't know if my actions have been inspirations
of if they were taken lightly; passed off as hallucinations

a tribulation or minor obstacle, my vindictive nature
is like taking candy from a stranger; when in danger
look to the manger; if you're confused just improvise
or make up lies; at least one day you'll feed the flies

look forward to your demise because you just might be remembered
plan it for this December among friends or with your neighbor
on the brink of insanity or in perfect health
remind yourself of why and how you got here and how to avoid hell

sell sell Sell to the highest bidder; and always consider the fact
that when you relax there's someone out there trembling
trembling in fear or in regret or in sorrow
for some there's no tomorrow and it leaves you hollow

It leaves you empty, without emotion
after exerting such sincere devotion you're lost
abandoned by your leader and left to bleed
plant a seed and hope it sprouts despite the drought

because they are so devout there's no doubt
they will succeed and supersede the make believe wilderness
this jungle where survival of the fittest is all you witness
and in distress you make haste to escape your chaste

to taste that last drop, pick up where you left off
and remember what you forgot because you smoked pot
the rain brings pain like pins and needles on your skin
and your next of kin so far away they seem like legends

wallow in the darkness and realize where your heart is
for the smartest thing to do is depart isn't it?
the harvest isn't yielding so embark and hunt for feeling
ever sealing a future you never considered a possibility

kiss goodbye to peace and tranquility; lucidity and normality
and embrace insanity indemnity and conformity
now this spiel is based purely on mental fragments
so don't read too deeply into the shallow end

this spiel is based purely on mental fragments
so don't read too deeply into the shallow end

High Time... Listen to a mediocre performance and recording

I'm left with
solitude more and more these days
it's hard to smile alone and say
it's not my fault my life's so gray
it's high time I found a lady

to hold
to love
to be proud of

you see my
attitude's poor and I'm upset
it's hard to fill a queen sized bed
with a single person's aching head
it's high time I found a lady

to talk to
to trust in
to be in love with

it seems I'm
overworked and over my budget
it's myself I have a grudge with
unmotivated and sinking in
it's high time I found a lady

to believe in
to live for
to absolutely adore

so tired of
night clubs filled with smoke and sin
women who look but don't listen
men who fight for their attention
it's high time I found a lady

to hold
to love
to be proud of

to talk to
to trust in
to be in love with

to believe in
to live for
to absolutely adore

to talk to
to trust in
to be in love with